You have to wonder if the powers-that-be responsible for Notre Dame's 2006 schedule weren't nipping at some Irish whiskey while they went about their job.

To say their efforts resulted in somewhat of a mishmash is an understatement. Literally, these guys were all over the road map.

Trying to make some sense out of their handiwork takes some doing. You'd probably need to be a clinical psychologist to understand the rather muddled reasoning behind their actions.

Does anyone have a Rorschach test handy?

Just looking at the Irish slate is enough to make one question its' originators wisdom if not their sanity. Randomly pulling names out of a hat most likely would have produced a more logical result.

Now that's not to imply that devising schedules is a snap. It can be laborious work and it requires a great deal of research, foresight and perception.

Also, the vagaries of luck and chance are often involved. Because ND is an independent, sometimes their availability doesn't jive with a majority of schools who have a conference affiliation. This problem becomes particularly acute as a given season is winding down and conference play heats up.

But no excuse or justification can adequately explain the hodgepodge that is ND's slate, circa '06.

What precisely is wrong with it? May we count the ways.

To begin with, it has too much of a California Dreamin' slant to it. It's absolutely imbecilic to schedule three teams from the Golden State in the same calendar year. Talk about being excessive. This is overload to the max.

Notre Dame is suppose to be a national school that takes on comers from all points of the country. Having 25% of your opponents hail from the Left Coast is just plain daffy.

At this rate, why don't the Irish just drop all pretense and join the Pac 10. Better yet, since ND will continue to play a trio of Cali schools in each of the next two years, how about moving the campus from South Bend to Burbank so that the Domers can be closer to their base.

Criticism number two is akin to the one mentioned above. Only this time the overindulgence involves the service academies.

Now it's one thing to be patriotic but this is carrying things a bit too far. When you've got all the branches of service represented on your ledger, you open yourself up to plenty of mocking and ridicule.

I'm sure you've all heard the latest joke making the rounds. Hey Notre Dame, didn't you forget the Coast Guard Academy? Ouch!

But you make yourself the target for such taunts when go too heavy on the military.

Now there's nothing wrong with scheduling the academies in moderation. One is fine but having two onboard starts to push the envelope.

When you play all three, it smacks of padding your record and loading up on cupcakes. It damages your credibility and hurts your reputation. It also gives poll voters a convenient excuse to downgrade the Irish.

The Domers should be about winning national championships, not the Commander-In-Chief trophy.

I'm not saying that the Irish are above going the military route. There's no denying that both Navy and the Air Force have caused the Irish more than their share of anxious moments in the past.

But common sense needs to reign.

Since the Irish have a tie with Navy that dates back to 1927, there's little room on the docket for another service school and only then on a periodic basis.

If you want, you can alternate between the Cadets and the Falcons sporadically but both at once is a unnecessary act of overkill.

The only explanation I can think of for this military fixation is that ND's schedule mavens were listening to some John Philip Sousa marches and simply got caught up in the moment.

As troubling and confounding as having three games against both California and service schools may be, this year's slate has an even bigger flaw.

It has no balance. It has no flow. It lacks continuity.

Much like last season, the schedule is much too top-heavy. This sort of front-loading is dangerous and ill-advised. Teams are generally looking to find themselves early and need some time to grow.

Hence, it's ideal to ease into the season with a couple of mid-tier clubs and then go from there. But the Irish rarely if ever follow this model. They jump into the frying pan right from the get-go. That modus operandi isn't conducive to undefeated seasons.

Usually, that approach catches up with you and it certainly did with the Irish. It became a grind the minute they left the starting gate.

First, it was an always difficult trip down to Atlanta to take on Georgia Tech. Then, it was home the following week against dangerous Penn State.

Next came a grueling gauntlet versus three intense Big Ten rivals, Michigan, Michigan State and Purdue.

Not a breather in sight for the season's first five weeks. No rest for the weary. Predictably, the Domers got stung.

Still searching for an identity when they faced the Wolverines, the Irish were ill prepared to meet the onslaught from Lloyd Carr's crew. They took a spanking

Seven days later, the Domers were still in a funk from their Michigan bummer and came out painfully flat versus MSU. Only some amazing late-game heroics saved them from another gut-wrenching setback.

While no one can say with any certainty that some schedule tweaking might have led to better efforts in those contests, there's more than room for speculation.

For ND, starting the season with five such tests is highly debatable. It easily can become a case of too much, too soon, too fast.

And as a result of putting most of your marquee games at the top, the rest of your schedule pales in comparison. The perception then becomes that you're playing nothing but lesser-lights down the stretch with the lone exception being SC.

And what kind of preparation is that leading into the titanic tussle with the Trojans when you're doing battle with the likes of North Carolina, Air Force and Army?

This schedule is devoid of proper spacing or dividing lines. It doesn't build in increments to a few anticipated crescendos. Instead, it comes out blazing, settles into somewhat of a lull and then finishes with one mighty flurry.

Where's the equilibrium? Where's the rhythm? Do you see any balance here?

Again, I harken to the fact that arranging schedules can be an arduous task but the men behind this one took the easy one out.

In this reporter's opinion, they got lazy and showed no creativity or innovation. It seems as if it was just thrown together willy-nilly with no regard to how it might play out on either the field or in the public's perception.

To put it bluntly, the decision makers fumbled.

A more insightful group might have tried to include a Big 12 school like Missouri, Kansas, Colorado or one of the Texas institutions.

What about dropping one of the California trio for a match-up with an ACC team such as Virginia, Maryland or NC State?

Couldn't one of the academies have been bypassed for a Mountain West foe ala Utah, Wyoming or Colorado State.

Then there's always the SEC and we're not talking about a heavyweight either. The Irish have enough of those. But what about solid teams like Georgia, South Carolina or Arkansas?

Well, you get the picture. It's hard to reckon that more imagination couldn't have gone into the makeup of this year's slate. This wasn't exactly an example of bright minds at work.

Yet, what's done is done. The die is cast and we'll see how it all turns out. After all, the Irish can only play the schedule before them.

But make no mistake. Those in the sports department didn't exactly distinguish themselves with this lineup of games. In a nutshell, they could've done much better.

And ultimately, the Irish may pay for the errors of those entrusted with looking out for the team's best interests.